And a baby girl was born.

So maybe the story of a birth has only an audience of mothers and soon-to-be mothers and that’s ok. I was once one and am now the other and I read them. Here’s the thing about motherhood, it is so diverse, and every story is different. Different bodies, different labor plans, and different little babies make everything so unpredictable. That, I assume, is the hardest part for us women: we are not in control of the pain or of our body.  It is some pretty rough pain we are talking about here. So as I prepared for my own pain I found it interesting to read about others pain. Maybe that scared me more, yes it did, that scared me even more. So there must be a scared soon-to-be mom like me out there somewhere and I write this for you. Here is a little positive look at the easiest birth I have ever heard about. Mine.

The Story of the day Lydia Capri West was born.

So its turns out I seemed to be an early starter, I dilated to 1 cm about 2 months prior to my due date. By mid October I was 2cm and 80-90% effaced (thinned out for those who don’t know). These little numbers convinced my doctor that my baby girl wanted to come play for Halloween. She seemed so sure, yet of course couldn’t make any promises, you know that doctor thing.  We all gritted our teeth for Kasey’s birthday( he wanted to share – and why wouldn’t he? He already does. But I don’t think she would like that really until she was about maybe 30) And then nothing. Maybe Halloween? (At least there would always be a party) Nope.  So we grew some patience and tried to do other things than sit and stare at each other, which is very hard to do in that case.

I was having pain of course, she had dropped like a month early and so I could hardly walk with her head between my hips. My little brother even tried to youtube me outside of a restaurant on Kasey’s birthday. It was quite a severe waddle. I even fell on the floor and couldn’t get up a couple of times. I went to the L&D once but they just gave me some pills and said goodbye as the nurse wheeled me out to the car. I couldn't sleep it hurt so bad. That was the hardest part of everything. 

Things got better, easier as November 9^th got closer. That seemed backwards but I was grateful.  I saw my doctor on my due date and she informed me of a “no stress test” which she liked to do when any patient was over due. We scheduled it for the next day. Basically they check the baby’s vitals and measure all the water to make sure there is at least 10cm of extra space for swimming. I measured at like 17.43 centimeters so almost double the ideal. Apparently the model Uterus, a deluxe suit it seemed.  So I went home.  4 hours later as I stood up to shut the sliding door I wet myself. Oh! I was pretty excited to meet baby but I thought I'd clean up in the shower first. When I went to get dressed, I suddenly was all wet AGAIN. As I was wearing my husband’s shorts, I kindly took them to the laundry room where I got wet AGAIN. Yep three times and I learned my lesson, I needed a towel down there.  After I figured that out I called Kasey, he was on his way. I let my best friends know that something was finally about to happen and since I wasn’t having contractions I thought, hey I have 24 hours – I'll curl my hair. Impatient Kasey was a little to a lot bothered by the sight of my hair wrapped around the iron when he arrived home and started packing. But I had to look good… I was going to meet my daughter… and take pictures.

When we pulled up to the hospital Kasey turned and said, ”Go get a wheelchair and I’ll be right in.”   No. So after he brought the wheelchair to my door and I sat my towel-padded bum in it, I waited for him to park. We checked in and there my water broke what could have been the 8^th time, and it over came the towel and Kasey’s sweat pants. So I just wanted to get behind closed doors when the check in girl asked,” Should we check her to make sure its amniotic fluid?”, lucky me the nurse that had checked me that morning said, “Oh I’m sure she would know.” So I got a room - spilled some more water on the floor in there -  and still, not really any pain. Then it was IV time, a little preface: I give blood, so I have good veins and exspirence. Nurse 1 try’s twice, once in each wrist and blows both veins. Nurse 2 try’s the left hand and blows it. One shot left so they call in the Dr. Johnson – the epi. man.  Seriously? Ouch. I had busies on both hands and wrists for a week. Turns out I would say that was the most painful part of the whole day.

So I had researched birth options by Internet and by pondering family members experiences. After I watched videos of a few options I decided that I had no idea what was going to happen.  So I went with medication, it just looked so much happier.  I didn’t want to be stuck in labor for 5 days and have some horror story of this magic moment where my daughter entered my life. And well that’s just me. I was looking for peace and emotion and love. Not like you can’t have those feelings in another way, I’m sure they might be even stronger with more suffering BUT I wanted those good things to be the main focus. So after they got my iv in about 6ish they checked my progress and I was staying about the same. They decided to induce me at 9 so I chose to get the epi at 8:30 before I felt any real pain. There are some horror stories about epi’s, mine was not one of those. Dr. Johnson pricked me with a little needle to numb me first – I felt that but it was just a tiny poke. I sat there growing more nervous about the epi while the doctor told me stories of fathers-to-be passing out. Then I felt nothing. Really nothing. Then I just started to not feel anything down there. It was great. I slept through the night, well besides when they checked my blood pressure every 30 min.

3am came around and they decided to wake us up.  In like 30 min I went from a 3 to a 9+. It was time to call mama and the other fam. And it was time to start pushing. This is when I found out my doctor wasn’t coming – and I got mad. I picked a lady for a reason, now I was getting a man. Apparently this is very common. That’s stupid, they should be there. Lucky for me I ended up liking the man doctor more than my regular doctor.

My body tends to overcome medicine in every numbing situation I have had in life. It happened again here. But my friend Dr. Johnson was right down the hall with an extra dose on hand. I would start to feel the contractions in my left abdomen, so he shot me up like three extra times. Almost a fouth but I didn’t ask for it, the slight pain gave me a sense of direction in my pushing so I never asked for it. I guess I’m real good at pushing, I even got her through what the doctor called, “a really small whole.” Well until he stopped me to remove the cord around her neck, he commented, “ She is already playing dress up.”  And yes he did have to cut me to a level 2 (I’m not sure how much that is but there are 4 levels: so about half). He was great. Dr. Curtis at Riverton Hospital… just throwing it out there. She was like his 9,166^th birth or something, he even wrote it for us on her birth certificate. That sweet man listened to everything that come out of my mouth even when even Kasey didn’t . He answered every crazy question about clubbed feet and not being able to breath to what I thought was dark skin (she was just purple). What did I know? I was all drugged and tired and it was like 5:23 am by that point.

DISCLAIMER TMI COMING, SKIP IF NEEDED- 

Here is a little embarrassing tid bit no one seems to mention- I threw up twice. Once was because my blood pressure went low and the second, on my poor husbands hand, because of the effort of my pushing. I felt it coming with every contraction and I was fighting it so hard. But it came out. I felt embarrassed because I did’t know how common that is. So in case that happens to you, just know I did it too.

So the after birth was a sinch, I didn’t feel a thing. The episiotomy was a little annoying the following couple of days in the hospital but the ice pack seemed to cure everything by the time I got home. I did care for it with a water sprayer (I’m not going to say it) and some numbing spray they gave me and these wet pads with which hazel – point I was getting to: Do everything they tell you and use everything they give you and you will be fine. 

It might be hard to control your pee the first two times it happens (you just might pee on the floor) and it might take a couple of days to potty. The pee thing was fine for me the third time. More than likley there will be stuff coming out of you for the entire 6 week recovery period. The potty thing, it hurts suddenly in all your sore mussels down there and that’s when you know its time to go. Its painful, even 5 weeks later. Its like that hole shrunk or something. You just might bleed every time. It does seem to be getting better.  

AND CONTINUE HERE-

So yes I just blogged about that. You kind of become a little unashamed after you give birth. Maybe it will wear off. I just feel like there are so many things to worry about when your pregnant and they can make you scared. So if me writing all of this made just one of you a little less scared then I feel good about it.  Birth doesn’t have to be a scary thing: it’s so happy. So happy I’m defiantly planning on doing it again. I mean look at this face. 

Honestly. I have never felt so strong in my life, but i had to look back to realize what I had accomplished.  That morning everything in me was focused on that tiny little baby girl. Kasey, and even I, thought that I would be crying - a lot. I had already done that almost everyday I had waited to meet her, but in those moments there were no tears. Those came later. I just looked at her, amazed. It is so amazing the way Heavenly Father lets us bring his precious spirits into this life. Its not always easy and its not always painful. It is always Amazing- in every sense of the word. I just looked at her face, at her dimples as she cried and - I worried about her. Was her color ok, was she crying ok - I was too wrapped up in her to bother with my own emotions or feelings. I felt motherhood and nothing else. I have heard the General Authorities say that motherhood is the closest resemblance to Saviorhood that we find on the earth. My understanding of that statement happened on 11/11/2011 when I looked into those blue-gray eyes and cared more about her life than mine. 

I love my husband, and I love to serve him- I really know that I would do anything for him, even give my life in theory. I love the Savior and I hope to repay him all that he has given me. But the feelings of love I have for this little girl- she represents everything that is good in me. She is everything that I love about myself and everything that I love about my husband and I hope to in essence, to be her savior. She is everything I have ever loved and more. She is one more reason - perhaps the most important reason - I have to do my best and I glory in that. Maybe thats why Heavenly Father lets us be mothers. Maybe thats why Heavenly Father let me be a mother. In her face I see the reasons why I have spent so many years praying, following the prophets, keeping the commandments. Its never just about us - it is always about those we lead. My family has grown, my purpose has grown. Kasey and I have created life out of our love. 

I want to see what else we can make.